One afternoon I fell asleep on the couch while the kids were napping. Madeline woke me up and I said, "Mommy was sleepy!" She patted my head and said, "I know, baby."
We were at the grocery store and the cashier asked to see my ID for buying a bottle of wine. I showed it to her, and she asks "How old are you?" (guess she didn't feel like doing math)
I told her I was 31 and Madeline says, "31, that's like a thousand!"
While driving in the neighborhood:
Madeline: "Mommy, look at that guy walking the puppies! They are SO cute!"
Me: "Yes, they are cute!"
Madeline: "If they run in front of your car they're going to get squished."
"My eyebrow hurts"
While watching Disney Jr:
"Mommy, if only I had a magic amulet to be a mermaid like Ariel."
HUH? I googled "amulet" and it means "alleged power to protect its owner from danger or harm." I'm assuming she heard this on a Disney Jr commercial...
After "community helper" day at school she came home with a sticker police badge. I said, "Maddie, I like your sticker!" She says, "Mommy, it's not a sticker its a BADGE." Excuse me.
He was throwing toys through a banister from the game room to the foyer, which he knows is not allowed. I used a stern voice to correct him and he started crying.
Me: "Now what do you tell Mommy?"
Andrew: (while crying) "Thank you."
I was expecting sorry...
41 minutes ago