Madeline: "My feet are ready to party."
Andrew to me, anytime I tell him something he doesn't like: "I'm not happy with you."
It was raining outside and Andrew said, "If we don't get rain then our crops won't grow."
Madeline, after I accidentally gave her Andrew's plate: "When I eat on a boy plate I feel like a squished pancake."
I was bathing the boys one night and I told Andrew he needed to wash his arm pit. He said, "I also need to wash my knee pit."
Madeline: "Do you think Daddy can come eat lunch with me at school next Tuesday? Or maybe not if one of his customers calls and he has to go to lunch for sales." (The girl gets it!)
Madeline: "I'm hydrating. What does hydrating mean?"
We were in church one Sunday and the Priest said something about an iPad. Andrew looked at me and said, "The Priest said I need an iPad."
Madeline: "Why are you sad that I'm going to school?"
Jon: "Because I'm going to miss you."
Madeline: "You're going to miss your little girl?"
Madeline: "Well that's what happens when kids grow up."
We were saying prayers the night before school started. Madeline's prayer was, "Dear God, please help Mom and Dad not cry tomorrow."
Madeline: "So I go to school every day now?"
Me: "Yes, Monday through Friday."
Madeline: (sighs) "Well that's going to make it really hard to have a play date."
One day after school I asked Madeline how her day was at school. She sighed and said, "It's just not the same without Samantha."
I'm going to call this one a "Mommyism." The second day of school was NUTS. The weather was horrible and we had to wait in the carpool line for an hour to pick up Madeline. We got home and had to rush back out the door for dance. I told Andrew he could eat a bag of popcorn in the car on the way to dance. He asked for it, so I reached in my purse and handed him a ziplock bag.
Madeline: "Mom, that's not popcorn."
Me: "Yes, it is."
Madeline: "No it isn't, Mom."
Me: (irritated) "MADELINE. IT'S POPCORN."
Madeline: "NO. IT. ISN'T."
We get to a stop sign, so I turn around and look at Andrew. I had given him a bag of powdered formula (that was supposed to be for P's bottle at dance). He was EATING it with his hands! Yuck!
Questions of eternal significance:
Madeline: "What do cows look like on the inside?"
Andrew: "When can I meet you and Dad's children?"
Andrew: "Why can't I see my eyes?"